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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
You know it ain't Halloween for another few months, kid?
- Yeah, but that's not fair! - Yeah, life's not fair, kid. Get over it.
Don't take it personal, though. We don't trust anybody.
You're a pussy.
What's with the high-fives?
or see what me and Katie's kids would look like
Who the hell is this guy?
Who the fuck are you?
The name of
so I promised her my Kick-Ass days were over.
I had something worth living for,
Mysterious traveler from another dimension.
- Stop with the fork. - I apologize.
Well, there's this one guy Rasul, and I felt so sorry for him.
Is he the kind of guy you'd go for, with all that leather?
Oh, great.
Yo, kid, who the hell are you? And what is this?
- Dave? What the fuck are you doing? - I'm sorry.
I need these things.
That should be really difficult for you. Are you okay?
Take a seat.
see what's really going on.
According to him, you sold him my coke and you took the money.
And that's exactly what I'm gonna do.
Suddenly, I understood why superheroes only existed in comic books.
and I ain't gonna disappoint him.
- Are you sure? - You gotta help me, Vic.
The mist.
What the fuck are you looking at?
Can he hear you? I don't think he can hear you.
you know, we didn't get beat up and have all our clothes taken off.
Kick-Ass, I'm sorry!
I'm right here now, baby. What's up?
What?
Yeah, man! You and me together, we would own!
Guess who?
Shit.
my dad,
it could be one of the most widely-viewed live events in web history.
Do you feel like checking out that new Kate Hudson movie
Kill my men, huh?
I'm going to convert you to a comics reader right now.
Red Mist.
A superhero never reveals his true identity.
Can I get a puppy?
What kind of kid has a... A Spider-Man party, sure, but a fucking Kick-Ass party?
I’m just fucking with you
High-fiving bullshit. Keep going, keep going.
It ain't gonna bring her back, Damon.
Not too close.
eventually, fantasizing just doesn't do it for you anymore.
Okay. You gotta stay away from Katie now. It's over.
Mindy Macready.
but you don't pronounce it. Like in the word "Knuckleduster."
Welcome to this special edition of Eye on New York.
I'm not going in.
Fuck!
Is this Frank D'Amico's place?
are burnt to ashes and buried.
Hey.
and a slightly elevated capacity to take a kicking.
- Yeah, that's fine. - Get him a Pepsi, and I'll have an Icee.
You're out of luck.
I want your hands all over me, Dave.
All right, come on. Go ahead.
Show's over, motherfuckers.
What a douche!
Hey! Call 911!
where she's like a shoe designer, can't get a guy?
after a 911 call from someone claiming to be a superhero...
- You wanna go talk to him? I can move. - Dave... Dave should go.
If they didn't, he will.
You saw him bringing out like a ton of stuff.
I lied to you, I know.
Here, kitty. Here, Mr. Bitey.
We're gonna show you what they can do. Go ahead, boys.
That you're a greedy little cocksucker or all my coke was stolen by Superman?
I mean, that's not homophobic, is it?
- Did you hear that? - Holy shit.
A bazooka?
One of us is still a cop, remember?
Really?
Holy fuck, Fashion, everybody's dead.
- Tony! - Tony.
Johann Gambolputty
It was time to engage.
Now in France, they say the word "stick" like this, bâton.