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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
Gay or straight?
[GROANS]
MAX: See you tomorrow. ARIEL: Yeah, I'm looking forward to it.
[WHISPERS] Jacob.
[SOBBING]
...was delicious. Ha, ha.
- Yeah. - Cream and sugar?
I don't know what's wrong with him. He just exploded.
What?
JACOB: Pop, I can't tell if this is done.
Oh, for God's sake.
A stroke is no damn good. You could end up like a vegetable.
...I would've asked for another million.
Oh, yes, yeah, new neighbor. Yeah, she came over to see me last night.
You're supposed to be smoking filter cigarettes, Pop.
Uh...
It's time for bed.
MATTHAU: I was also in the movies for a while. I was a lousy actor.
Oh, Chuck.
[CHUCKLES]
[GRUNTS]
...of accompanying me to my ice shanty tomorrow?
Yeah. How was the turkey at the VFW this year, Chucky?
Do you believe in angels?
Always.
Did you get it worked out?
ARIEL: Here we go. - Wait, wait!
- John. JOHN: Yeah?
Oh, no. There can be no stuffing. This is a live creature.
We can be thanKful that we had the privilege of knowing him...
- Over at the Gustafsons'? - Yeah.
Never mind. Just forget it.
Looks like Chuck's gonna bury his boner.
...that his ex-wife had a part-time job for 11 of those 20 years.
Head-on collision with a freight truck.
Shrimp thinks he can get funny with me.
- Fishing pole? - Yes.
What?
- Did you mount her? - Oh, Dad.
[BELLS TOLLING]
...uh, where I could find Mr. Gustafson?
- Much better than having your palm read. - Well, uh...
MAX: Merry Christmas.
...you never would have had Amy. And Amy was a good woman.
All right. Now, careful, fellas, huh? Hey, Mel.
I'm Ariel Truax.
Idiot.
It was my Roosevelt's New Deal lecture.
- Oh, I almost lost him. - Max, oh, he's just magnificent.
Reared by local volunteer firefighter, Peter Carlson, of Wabasha...
[STAMMERS]
- That we share something special. - Teaching.
A men's strip joint?
No, I mean, you know...
- Merry Christmas, Dad. - Merry...
Pain. He... Is it...? Does he?
[ALL SHOUTING]
[DOORBELL RINGING]
That's just great.
[OPERA MUSIC PLAYING]
You're still using that beat-up piece of firewood?
Miss Truax, would you do me the honor...
MAX: Okay. Okay. JACOB: Ta-da!
Ah, that's okay. Gustafson does the same thing.
- Let me... Pull! - Stop!
Damn kids.
What are you, uh...
GRANDPA: Kids. You can't live with them, can't shoot them.
It's the Green Hornet.
Yeah, He’s a Regular Don McJuan
Stupid moron.
CHUCK: Ha, ha. Can I get you something?
Tell me something, Chuck.
Hi, I'm Ariel Truax, your new neighbor.
Chuck? How?
- Yeah? - Mm.
- Ready for this? - No, not really.
What for?
That bitch is a damn liar
The Daughters of the American Revolution are having a little dance at the VFW.
If you're not going to keep our date tonight...
Oh.
That wobbly head smelly is a damn liar
...new places, and meet new people.
...kissing up to a couple of buckets of fish bait. Ha!
...I'm staying at Pop's.
How the hell should I know? I just got here.
[BOTH LAUGHING]
[ARIEL YELPS]
[DOOR CHIMES]