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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
We're so tired. We really are.
We sold them to the gay man at the flea market
Why do you keep doing this, Mom?
POPO! POPO!
because we know we could die tomorrow!
I think he's probably gonna haunt the house forever.
Hey!
'Cause e'rybody got got to get tipsy.
I was kind and clean!
Hey Hillary....
Hi. You guys are welcome here. You know that, right?
Absolutely hell no.
Why don't you greet your guests?
What the fuckenheimer? Grown-up parties suck.
She's almost here. She's here now.
Stop that mud wrestling now!
If so, please tell them hello for us.
Everybody!
Get in there, kid.
James, let me get you to a hospital.
You know what? Forget it. It'll just get screwed up. I'll do it.
No, I'm not. That was a lie.
Kate! Maura!
Oh, my God!
Better work.
We're just gonna take some low-level, late '80s dirt pot.
You look so free and not oppressed at all. We were worried about you.
It means me. I don't... It doesn't mean you.
That's a great idea. No.
Okay.
- Ew. Fuck my life. - Gross!
Here she comes. She's coming close. She's right here.
You're blinking. You're fake freezing.
It is tight. This is very tight.
Is this your waxing strip?
Take it!
Why don't you try sticking your head up your ass and see if it fits?
The dog-sitters number is on the counter.
I am at a friend's house.
when I heard you were having an Ellis Island party
is that you and I used to have a blast in grade school.
Come on, Maura!
Hey, you backing it up!
No, honey.
I sold that Hot rod
We heard that Atlanta had a terrible storm.
Oh, good. Here's a quote from Helen Keller.
Okay. I won't drink tonight. You groin it up.
Shit.
How's it going in here?
Now remind me that you know how to do this. Whoo!
We need to cancel dinner with Mom and Dad.
Wow.
That's not my cousin. That's my husband.
Okay, goodbye. Oh!
And I would hate to see you out there blowing hobos at 40.
I need more stevia!
Do you get good Wi-Fi with that?
Maura.
How I feel
the shoulder hickey that Brett gave me
When did we all get so old?
That's a girl's belt.
I am now a sponsor of a child in Ecuador.
Oh...
When it's below 60 degrees in Texas
I could French manicure a chicken while it was running away.
Oh, I remember.
Now you tell me a secret.
One of my apples keeps rolling out of the bag.
It's a done deal.
When ur friend says they don't have drugs but there is some on the table
You know, the kind with seeds in it that you separate on a Frisbee.
Relax!
because we thought we would never die.
I'm not Italian. I don't know why I said it like that.
I do know my shit.
No, I'm not dying. I'm just sick of winding them.
Thank you.
You told me you were gonna take care of things
Wow. You're doing a really nice job. Oh, thank you.
because I have a domestic side. Mmm-hmm.
Oh.
Um, no... 'Cause I've seen one like it at Target.
Hae-Won. What a beautiful name. What does that mean?
I GOT A BALONEY DICK I GOT A BALONEY DICK
we have some news.
You seem good at your job.
You know what? Tonight, I'm actually the only person who's not partying.
Old people aren't supposed to be in the sun! So stupid.
but Rob's penis has a kink in it.
We have no energy for this goddamn shit.
We did it, you guys.
No. Actually, um, Diet Coke.
We suffered from secondhand hate.
Okay. You got it? Yeah, I got it-Yeah, no, no.
Uh, Robert Pacino.
Give me that phone! Give me that!
Not Hae-Won. Hae-Won.
fucking texting her every day, and freaking out about her every day.
Wait a minute. Your eyes are gorgeous.
Geernt!
Okay. Hold the sex phone.
Kale! Kate! Kate!
How did I not die doing this?
I think you're being a little dramatic. I'm not.
Chase has night terrors.
That's your husband?
You've already fixed so many things.
Hey, look at you.
Hey, I want Pop-Pop's grandfather clock.
A party?
Ah, I knew you were talking shit about us.
I mean, it is like, dead ringer times.
Then what the fuck is this?
Hae-Won. No. Hae-Won.
and my mom has to get a wipe, and she has to wipe out my paws every time.
That!
P.S. this does not feel right. Hello.
Everyone's distracted by the emergency right now.
We used to party in this house like animals
Well, I just figured I'd pop in and say hello to everyone.
I'm a solid guy. I don't mind being the butt of your jokes.
but I know they did.
Because we knew you'd try to talk us out of it.
I'll be you. You be me.
Uh, it's B-dot-rinda...
Wow. You look so happy.
Why don't people tell me things?
I feel like I'm saying it right. No?
Can you let your parents know that if things like this aren't fixed by Monday,
Okay, guys, can you guess who I am? Ready?
so we can do the Applebutt Jam.
Because you heard what happened, right?
To you.
Here, give me a kiss.
You're pads all the way and everyone knows it.
It's gonna work this time, honey, I promise.
They were gonna give away the foldy yardstick?
Haha
Oh, my God.
Yes, my neighbors are having a loud party, and I'd like to complain.
Oh, shit!
It's good stuff in here.
Me.
and I felt bad for her, you know?
Go and live your life
That old tree has gotta go.
Foam party!
I could put this one in the condo, if you like.
Maybe.
Are you at a party right now?
when I was on drugs.
Who said that?
So I ended up having a vaginal rejuvenation.